One More Minute
by Lucy Pryde
Summary: What do you get when you combine a doo-wopping trio of the Weasley twins and Neville, a Cho-bashing Harry, a parody of Weird Al's "One More Minute", a microphone that breaks often and a snog session? Pure hilarity, and Cho torture by the gallon!


_**Disclaimer:**_** I do not own "One More Minute" by Weird Al, nor do I own any of J.K. Rowling's characters/places/situations.**

**A/N:** **Hello, everyone. I was listening to the song mentioned in the disclaimer, and after reading numerous fics about Harry, I remembered how much I loathed Cho Chang. Thusly, I decided to write a parody song/music video to the actual song and music video which can be found on YouTube by searching for "One More Minute" by Weird Al. IT helps the mood of the story if you open the song in a new tab and listen to it, or watch the music video ahead of time. Enjoy!**

Ginny Weasley lay asleep in her bed on August 31st, the day before she was supposed to board the train to attend her fifth year at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry.

Harry Potter, clad in dress robes, took the stage at the Halloween feast. The professors all cleared off the stage, including Snape, who, for once, gave in to one of Harry's requests. All of his peers sat at their House tables, staring expectantly at him.

Behind him, standing on the professors' table were Neville Longbottom and Fred and George Weasley, who had come to Hogwarts per Harry's bequeathal. The Great Hall was silent, and Harry quickly cast a Sonorus Charm on his voice and dimmed the lights. Fred stepped forward, also using the Sonorus Charm.

"Attention Gryffindors, Hufflepuffs, and, specifically, a certain Ravenclaw by the name of Cho Chang: Harry Potter has a song that he would like to sing. The Slytherins can simply stuff their snake-holes." McGonagall made a noise of disapproval, but Fred just laughed and gestured for Harry to take the stage.

Magically, a single spotlight appeared on Harry, who, although he was under Sonorus, felt the need to use a Muggle microphone from the 1960s. He held the microphone, looked down, and nodded. A soft ballad began playing in the background and Neville, George and Fred started singing "ah" to the music. Eventually, Harry began his song, with the backup trio "doo wopping" along.

"_Well I heard that you're grievin'"_

Fred, George and Neville echoed the last word, snapping their fingers in coordinated directions. They resumed "doo wopping".

"_Oh, I don't have to read minds,"_ sang Harry, smirking slightly. The trio again echoed him_ (Don't read minds)_ and snapped.

"_You're still mourning for your lover,"_ Harry was singing, swaying along with the music.

"_You decided that I'm not your kind!" _He clutched the microphone.

"_So I scratched your name off of the contract,"_ with that, he took out the DA contract and drew a large red line through Cho's name.

"_And I tore all your homework in two,"_ to illustrate, he summoned a large stack of parchment with neat script on it and proceeded to rip it in half and throw the pieces to either side of himself.

"_And I burned down the tea shop where we used to go,"_ he sang, conjuring a picture of Madame Puddifoot's in flames.

"_Just because it reminds me of you!" _Harry broke the microphone as he was clutching it so tightly in his anger at Cho. A quick "Reparo" from George, however, and it was as good as new.

Fred, George and Neville sang, "_Doo-ba-dee-do!"_

The audience wore mixed reactions. Cho was gaping, unbelieving, while half of the males at the Ravenclaw table were applauding. The entire Gryffindor table wore grins, and the Hufflepuffs, as well. The Slytherins were amused, and the professors appeared to be under Full-Body Binds.

"_You're right, you ain't gonna see me crying,"_ he sang, pretending to wipe away a tear.

"_I think I'll leave the tears up to you."_

"_Cause I'd rather have my brains sucked out by Nargles with a straw," _sang Harry, earning a grin from Luna,

"_Than spend one more minute with you_." At this, George and his company broke into a small chorus of "Ah"s.

"_Cho, do I seem kinda bitter?"_ Harry asked as he leaned towards the Ravenclaw table. Cho was crying, but didn't seem able to move.

"_You've got me feeling down in the dumps_," he sang, kicking away an empty butterbeer bottle.

"_But I'm stranded all alone in the Three Broomsticks of love," _Harry was singing, watching a large keg being wheeled across the stage by Seamus Finnigan.

"_And I have to use the D.I.Y. pump!"_ Harry broke the microphone again as he tapped himself a glass of butterbeer and proceeded to down it in one gulp. He tossed it away as he started to sing the next line of the song.

"_Oh, so, honey, let me help you with your school trunk!"_ Harry levitated Cho's trunk over to the Ravenclaw and let it slam on the table with a loud clatter.

"_I'm not gonna let you get me, too."_ The male Ravenclaws clapped even harder.

"_Because I'd rather get a Sectumsempera to the face,"_ he said, grimacing while the background trio mimed wiping blood from their faces.

"_Than spend one more minute with you," _Harry was smiling now, clutching a brand new microphone that Fred had conjured.

"_I'd rather rip out my intestines with my wand,"_ he sang, gathering a gaggle of grimaces from the crowd at the crude mental picture.

"_Than watch you going out with other guys,"_ Harry followed the melody, watching the Ravenclaw boys nod in approval.

Fred, George and Neville were now standing in a single-file line, facing the right wall of the Great Hall. They were moving their wand arms up towards their ears and then down at ninety-degree angles, making snap-like "pop"s emit from their wand tips.

"_I'd rather bang my scar against the floor_!" To illustrate, Harry fell to his knees and did just that. The background trio responded with a harmonized "Yeah!"

"_Again and again and again and again and again!"_

"_Oh, can't you see what I'm trying to say, darling,"_ spat Harry, writing fiery letters in the air with his wand. When he was done, the message read, "I think you're a cold-hearted witch!"

"_I'd rather have my blood sucked out by vampires,"_ Harry sang, pointing to his neck and then returning his hands to the microphone.

Neville, who was in the back of the line, was abruptly in the front when the background singers turned in the opposite direction from where they'd been standing.

"Vam-pires," they echoed, drawing out the word.

"_Spend an evening with a blast-ended screwt,"_ Harry separated the head of the microphone from the stand, effectively breaking it once more.

"_I'd rather clean all the toilets in Moaning Myrtle's bathroom with my tongue,"_ sang Harry, levitating several toilets to circle his head as he stuck out his tongue.

"_Than spend one more minute with you."_ He pointed at Cho, who was still crying but kept her eyes on Harry.

"_Yes, I'd rather jump naked onto a mountain of quill tips."_ Despite the reference to quill tips, half of the girls in the Great Hall got a glazed look over their eyes. The other half were grimacing, disgusted.

"_Submerge my Firebolt in a cauldron of glue,"_ he sang, while all of the Quidditch players gasped at how serious Harry must have been to even joke about such matters.

"_I'd rather dive into a battle with Voldie by myself,"_ sang Harry, noting the shudder that went throughout the room at his casual mention of the Dark Lord's name.

"_Than spend one more minute with you!"_ A new microphone appeared in front of Harry, and he took a deep breath as he made to finish his song.

"_I'd rather get stuck in a train car with Dementors who'd suck all the happiness out of me until I died!"_ Harry fell to the floor, miming his death. He sat there for three seconds before he slowly, very slowly got up and grabbed the microphone for one last time.

"_Than_," he sang slowly, approaching the Ravenclaw table. _"To spend," _he continued, climbing upon the table and casually kicking plates off as he made his way over to Cho. _"One more minute," _at the speed of a snail, he knelt next to Cho and locked his green, merry eyes with her tearful orbs. _"With you."_

George, Fed and Neville carried out the rest of the song, and when the music ended, Cho rose from her bench and ran from the great hall, tears streaming from her eyes and loud, girlish shrieks emitting from her mouth.

Everyone else was applauding, the noise nearly causing the castle to shake. The professors were still locked in their binds, and nobody made any move to release them. Instead, they gathered Harry upon their shoulders and proceeded to march him around the hall. When they finally set him down, he found himself face to face with Ginny Weasley, who was grinning at him. She threw her arms around his neck and snogged him senseless, and as he kissed her back, both Harry and Ginny were in complete, total and utter bliss.

"GINEVRA MOLLY WEASLEY, YOU GET DOWN TO BREAKFAST THIS INSTANT OR I'LL GET RID OF THAT DESTRUCTIVE COTTON BALL YOU CALL A PET!!!" Ginny awoke to her mother's screams.

As she tried to cuddle up further to her pillow, Ginny couldn't help but smile as she mumbled,

"Sure, mum. I just need one more minute."

**A/N: Feel free to drop me a line to tell me what's good, bad, or ugly about this fic. Personally, I think the last two apply to Cho….**


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